negative nancy

It's funny how... when you're completely submerged in a pool of irritation.... it keeps getting worse and worse as the day goes on.  I don't want to say it's a "bad day".. because that's not smart.  That only leads to... me not having a good day.  And who doesn't want to have a good day?

Irritation SUCKS ASS. 

I hate it.  Things happened this morning.. in my house... before I left work... I will spare you the details but they involved vomit and blood.  (not what you're thinking)  So of course my drive in is going to be irritating.  Slow drivers.. red lights... school buses.  It's like when there's a fumble on the field... everyone jumps on the ball... and all these humans keep piling up... one on top of another.  That's how irritations works.  

I had to laugh tho.  I come into the office and... get my things set up for the day.  I look at the US map on my wall and I see "Baja California".  .....and THAT irritates me.

"Why the fuck is it called California when it's in Mexico????"

These are the times that my inside voice tells me...  I need a beer.

Meditation would work even better.  Just meditated last night.  It was great.  Feeling calm is a tremendous feeling.  I love it so much, and I want to feel it always.

I feel like there is such turmoil happening most times.. inside my head.

*SIGH*

I cut my own hair last night.  Which is dumb because I don't know what I'm doing.  I was like.. "I don't even give a shit".

Someone..... come quick with an open hand.  And make it a good one. 

Oh, one more thing.  Another thing that pissed me off....  it's October 21st....  and this house has LIT REINDEER and a LIT MANGER in their front yard.  What the fuck is wrong with people?  I can't say there's something wrong with people getting excited about something... and it's not hurting anybody.... but... what happened to the two other holidays in between now and Dec 25?

I just don't like it.

There are lots of good, healthy, positive things that happen in my life, and I don't dismiss them.  It just seems like sometimes... when not-so-good things happen...  I take it personally.  I can't seem to just dust if off and move on.  It lingers.

Tonight will be a good night tho.